Nick Esasky

Alfred Hitchcock's Nick Esasky.

Why we like him: Nick Esasky signed a 3-year deal with the Atlanta Braves in 1990 that was considered "lucrative" at the time because Esasky was going to earn just under $2 million per year. Those were the days. It even seemed like pretty semi-smart money on Atlanta's part at the time as well. He was a 29-year old first baseman with some pretty good pop, and he was coming off a .277-30-108 season for the Red Sox. Not too shabby, but not quite enough to make you dizzy (more on that in a second). Before that, he turned in a few decent seasons with the Reds. I even remember hearing the buzz about this guy when I was a kid.

All that made me wonder what was up when he disappeared so abruptly. The truth is that Esasky, weirdly enough, was diagnosed with vertigo, and only managed to play 9 games for the Braves in 1990 (.171 with no homers, mind you) before calling it quits for good. The Braves continued to pay him for two more years just to fulfill the contract, but I'll always remember Nick Esasky as a Braves star who wasn't.

Ladies and gentlemen, Nick Esasky, ballplayer.

Throwback Thursday: Bob Shaw

That hair, or lack thereof, is epic.

Why we like him: Everyone loves a journeyman starting pitcher, and Bob Shaw was definitely the embodiment of the term. He played for 7 different teams during his 11-year career, and he never stayed in one place for more than 3 full seasons (Chicago with the White Sox from '58 to the middle of '61). Shaw did manage a single All Star appearance in 1962 with the then-Milwaukee Braves, and also finished third in Cy Young Voting behind his White Sox teammate, Early Wynn, and the Giants' Sam Jones in 1959 after posting an 18-6 record (a league-leading .818 winning percentage) and a 2.69 ERA en route to winning the pennant. After bouncing around more than a grounder to Jose Offerman, Shaw finished his career with a 108-98 record.

Shaw does, however, have his name atop a major league record. On May 4, 1963, while with the Braves, Shaw set the record for balks in a game with five against the Chicago Cubs.

Ladies and gentlemen, Bob Shaw, ballplayer.

Dave Stieb

Demonstrating the proper "slider face."

Why we like him: Dave Stieb was once an almost, almost unhittable pitcher. Granted he did have exactly one  career no-hitter, but I'll always remember Stieb as the guy who tossed a whopping and yet still impressive five career one-hitters. If that wasn't heartbreaking enough for the guy, three of his one-hitters were blown to smithereens with two outs in the ninth. All that aside, Stieb did put together a pretty good career, posting a record of 176-137 and a career ERA of 3.44.

Ladies and gentlemen, Dave Stieb, ballplayer.

Dwight Evans

How a ballplayer should look before he gets dirt all over himself.

Why we like him: Dwight Evans looked the way a ballplayer ought to look. He also played the way a ballplayer ought to play. He had it all: great offense and defense, eye black, stunning mustache... And "Dewey" was one of the premier players of the '80s, and he's continually underrated by fans to this day. He was a 3-time All Star and finished in the top ten in MVP voting four times. He hit 385 home runs during an era when 385 home runs still meant something. He won 8 Gold Gloves with help from his legendary and cannon-like bionic arm in right field.

The question I've often pondered is whether or not Evans was good enough to be inducted into the Hall of Fame. His numbers are certainly borderline at best, but when you look at him alongside other candidates from his time in the league (and even his own team), you could make a decently compelling case for Dewey. Let's have a look.

Dwight Evans: 20 years, .272, 385 HR, 4 MVP top tens, 8 Gold Gloves, 127 OPS+, nice guy.

Jim Rice: 16 years, .298, 382 HR, 6 MVP top tens, 0 Gold Gloves, 128 OPS+, jerkapottamus.

I'm not saying Evans was better than Rice, but they were certainly comparable. Dewey deserves a lot more credit than he gets for his career.

Ladies and gentlemen, Dwight Evans, ballplayer.

Mark Portugal

Just west of Spain and just north of .500.

Why we like him: I've always had a soft spot for journeyman starting pitchers, and especially ones with a single inexplicably fantastic season. I'm talking about that wonderful year of 1993. That season Portgual, then with the Astros (the team for which he's probably most well-known), smoked the National League to the tune of an 18-4 record and 2.77 ERA in 33 starts. That season was good enough for 6th place in the Cy Young voting. And just so you know, that's one spot behind Tommy Greene who finished at 16-4 with an ERA of 3.77. Talk about an uneducated vote.

Even better, Portugal took his frustrations out on the rest of the league's pitchers the next season (which was strike-shortened), rolling off a .354 batting average and even earning the Silver Slugger Award for pitchers. He wasn't a bad hitter for his career either as he brandished a semi-respectable (in pitching circles) .198 career average over 15 seasons. He even batted .260 in 1998 at the age of 35. He finished his pitching career at 109-95, just north of .500.

Ladies and gentlemen, Mark Portugal, ballplayer.

Dickie Thon

I miss gigantic stirrups.

Why we like him: With a name that sounded like an annual race in work khakis, Dickie Thon was a pretty consistent offensive infielder during the low-output 1980s and early 1990s. A good-hitting shortstop was somewhat of a luxury in those days, and during the 1983 season with the Astros, Thon batted .286 with 20 homers and 79 RBI (all personal bests) and he even finished 7th in MVP voting. He was a career .264 hitter, and he never really veered too far away from that average in any season. He just consistently went about his business at the plate and in the field for an unremarkable but respectable 15-year career.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dickie Thon, ballplayer.

Throwback Thursday: Fred Dunlap

Rockin' the sure shot.

Why we like him: Fred "Sure Shot" Dunlap was a machine in 1884 for the St. Louis Maroons. He also had what was arguably the fourth-best offensive season any player has ever had (if you go by the ever silly and contrived OPS+ stat). He led the league with balmy .412 batting average, and he also led the league in homers (just 13, but still), hits, and runs. All of that was good enough for a "Bondsian" OPS+ of 256, which is, like I said, the fourth-best mark ever just behind three Bonds seasons and even just ahead of three seasons by some guy named Ruth.

The crazy thing about Dunlap's career is that he never did anything else remotely remarkable (Okay, he did lead the league in doubles with 27 in 1880 as a rookie). He finished up his 12-year career at the age of just 32 as a lifetime .292 hitter. He even played in (and won) the 1887 World Series for the long defunct Detroit Wolverines against the St. Louis Browns, batting just .150 for the series.

Ladies and gentlemen, Fred Dunlap, ballplayer.