Dwight Evans

How a ballplayer should look before he gets dirt all over himself.

Why we like him: Dwight Evans looked the way a ballplayer ought to look. He also played the way a ballplayer ought to play. He had it all: great offense and defense, eye black, stunning mustache... And "Dewey" was one of the premier players of the '80s, and he's continually underrated by fans to this day. He was a 3-time All Star and finished in the top ten in MVP voting four times. He hit 385 home runs during an era when 385 home runs still meant something. He won 8 Gold Gloves with help from his legendary and cannon-like bionic arm in right field.

The question I've often pondered is whether or not Evans was good enough to be inducted into the Hall of Fame. His numbers are certainly borderline at best, but when you look at him alongside other candidates from his time in the league (and even his own team), you could make a decently compelling case for Dewey. Let's have a look.

Dwight Evans: 20 years, .272, 385 HR, 4 MVP top tens, 8 Gold Gloves, 127 OPS+, nice guy.

Jim Rice: 16 years, .298, 382 HR, 6 MVP top tens, 0 Gold Gloves, 128 OPS+, jerkapottamus.

I'm not saying Evans was better than Rice, but they were certainly comparable. Dewey deserves a lot more credit than he gets for his career.

Ladies and gentlemen, Dwight Evans, ballplayer.

Mark Portugal

Just west of Spain and just north of .500.

Why we like him: I've always had a soft spot for journeyman starting pitchers, and especially ones with a single inexplicably fantastic season. I'm talking about that wonderful year of 1993. That season Portgual, then with the Astros (the team for which he's probably most well-known), smoked the National League to the tune of an 18-4 record and 2.77 ERA in 33 starts. That season was good enough for 6th place in the Cy Young voting. And just so you know, that's one spot behind Tommy Greene who finished at 16-4 with an ERA of 3.77. Talk about an uneducated vote.

Even better, Portugal took his frustrations out on the rest of the league's pitchers the next season (which was strike-shortened), rolling off a .354 batting average and even earning the Silver Slugger Award for pitchers. He wasn't a bad hitter for his career either as he brandished a semi-respectable (in pitching circles) .198 career average over 15 seasons. He even batted .260 in 1998 at the age of 35. He finished his pitching career at 109-95, just north of .500.

Ladies and gentlemen, Mark Portugal, ballplayer.

Dickie Thon

I miss gigantic stirrups.

Why we like him: With a name that sounded like an annual race in work khakis, Dickie Thon was a pretty consistent offensive infielder during the low-output 1980s and early 1990s. A good-hitting shortstop was somewhat of a luxury in those days, and during the 1983 season with the Astros, Thon batted .286 with 20 homers and 79 RBI (all personal bests) and he even finished 7th in MVP voting. He was a career .264 hitter, and he never really veered too far away from that average in any season. He just consistently went about his business at the plate and in the field for an unremarkable but respectable 15-year career.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dickie Thon, ballplayer.

Throwback Thursday: Fred Dunlap

Rockin' the sure shot.

Why we like him: Fred "Sure Shot" Dunlap was a machine in 1884 for the St. Louis Maroons. He also had what was arguably the fourth-best offensive season any player has ever had (if you go by the ever silly and contrived OPS+ stat). He led the league with balmy .412 batting average, and he also led the league in homers (just 13, but still), hits, and runs. All of that was good enough for a "Bondsian" OPS+ of 256, which is, like I said, the fourth-best mark ever just behind three Bonds seasons and even just ahead of three seasons by some guy named Ruth.

The crazy thing about Dunlap's career is that he never did anything else remotely remarkable (Okay, he did lead the league in doubles with 27 in 1880 as a rookie). He finished up his 12-year career at the age of just 32 as a lifetime .292 hitter. He even played in (and won) the 1887 World Series for the long defunct Detroit Wolverines against the St. Louis Browns, batting just .150 for the series.

Ladies and gentlemen, Fred Dunlap, ballplayer.

Turk Wendell

Oral hygiene is more important that fastball command.

Why we like him: How can you not like him when he's quoted as saying stuff like this:  "I only wanted a few things out of life -- a wife, children, to play baseball and to hunt deer." Well okay then!

He was also renown for being one of baseball's most superstitious players of all time. He made Mark Fidrych look ordinary and made Darren Daulton look sane. Here's his single-inning routine:

• Chew four pieces of black licorice
• After the final out, spit them out
• Take a flying leap over the baseline on the way back to the dugout
• Brush teeth
• Repeat until the manager yanks you

What did ritualistically following all those superstitions get him? A 36-33 career record, a 3.93 ERA, 33 career saves, and a .070 batting average just for fun.

Ladies and gentlemen, Turk Wendell, ballplayer.

Throwback Thursday: Ross Barnes

Like a boss.

Why we like him: Ross Barnes had one of those special seasons in 1873, and I mean really special. He led the league in every important offensive category (that people cared to track) except for home runs and RBI. Here's a little glimpse of his numbers that season: He led the league in games played (with just 60!), had a .431 BA, hit 31 doubles and 11 triples, stole 43 bases, and walked 20 times (while striking out just twice). All of those were league bests that season, and it was good enough for the 10th best park-adjusted OPS+ season on the books.

Ladies and gentlemen, Ross Barnes, ballplayer.

Ramon Martinez

Sweaty dude.

Why we like him: Ah, yes, (this) Ramon Martinez. He'll probably forever be known as Pedro's lousy older brother, and to that, I say, "Not so fast, amigo." For for a stretch in the late '80s and the early '90s, Ramon was the Martinez everyone thought would be remembered as one of the all-time greats, and to be honest, looking back, he compiled a pretty impressive career. He went 135-88 with a career 3.67 ERA and won 15 or more games in a season on four separate occasions. Surprisingly, he was an All Star selection only once, which was in 1990 when he went 20-6 with a 2.92 ERA and lost out on the Cy Young Award to Doug Drabek who had just slightly better numbers. He was nowhere near the pitcher his younger brother was, but Ramon Martinez was still very, very good.

Ladies and gentlemen, Ramon Martinez, ballplayer.